Showing posts with label a certain ginger assistant. Show all posts
Showing posts with label a certain ginger assistant. Show all posts

Monday, October 18, 2010

"Couples Bonding" with sophie.

The doctor tholught sophie and I needed to "bond" more so he sent us to couple's exercises. I got to do trust falls, a human custom I have always wanted to do. First you make someone trust you by catching them and then you let them fall. It's a hilarious game! Then I tried to strangle sophie as another trust game but it didn't work out. The group leader was a terible hippie-type woman who told be my aura was pink. Pink? I said. Is this because I'm gay? I then educated sophie on her ginger aurra. We played a game where i got to throw stuff at her. She asked me questions and didn't let me ask any. Here are some questions:

S: What attracts you to the doctor?
M: The hair.

M: Do you have fetish for jack's coat?
S: define fetish ;)

S: what would you do if the doctor died?
m: DON'T YOU DARE HURT HIM!!!!

M: Have you had sex with jack yet?
S: -she refused to tell me this. in human, this means yes-

S: What did the doctor say to convince you to let me onto the tardis
M: He didn't say anything, but he later promised to feed, and take you out for walks, and clean up after you, and that i'd hardly know she's there, and look, she can even do science a little bit!

S: Does the doctor like me better than you?
M: I HATE YOU!

It was fun.

Sunday, August 29, 2010

Look, i drew a self portrait!

Hanawesome: handsome plus awesome. I got a new tie! it's purple! like blood! I like blood. NOT LIKE THAT, JACK! I added my location as venus, which apparently for the rather dim is in californya. I mean , californya? Did they put a decoy there? Everyone know venus (NOT YOU JACK) is in cardiff! Californya is made of fake tans and vampires. Even the slightly dim know that! You poor pathetic wierdly-cardioligical-arranged (it's a word because i say so) ape-beings know that! But apparently, my computer dosent. Maybe if i threaten it it'll work better?

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Transport

So, somehow this was NOT POSTED, grrr. Anyways, transporting to venus is like this: Go to stationy thing on earth. Pay OOLA MOOLA (24570000 UU (universal units for those of you who are rather dim (like a certain ginger assistant))). Still, teleporting is faster than shuttling, even if it's more expensive. Also, it provides good opportunities for certain ginger to have an "accident". Basically, for the rather dim, you get broken up into a bunch of molecule and then fly through SPAAACE. Then you get reassembled instantaneously at the other end, but you STILL have to go through security. They take away your weapons and everything! I said, "oh, it's just a LITTLE death ray" but NO. I needed to protect my Hubby! What if there was an emergency? What if I NEEDED to disintegrate screaming bystanders so he had an escape route? So you just ZAP there and then you're in the main Slidecation port IN SPAAACE. It is sort of like an artificial moon/space elevator, and from ther you can slide down to a slidecation/a floating hotel/ a fiery pit of death (GINGER).

Monday, June 7, 2010

Science

So. Had to do an (eeevil) presentation on Venus today to hubby. Hoping for eventual world domination, but you have to start small and then progress to to destroying the earth. Got assigned a skientist, she seems rather dim, but ginger. So: Venus is 108,942,109 km from the sun. Basically, it's REALLY HOT here. It rains sulferic acid, I nearly pushed a certain ginger assistant outside after she tried to explain basic nuclear physics to me AGAIN. There are lots of winds here, maybe a parasailing "accident"...